


Contraindications

by QuietlyImplode



Series: Rescue Me [19]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Clint Barton & Steve Rogers Friendship, Natasha Romanov Feels, Protective Steve Rogers, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov Friendship, Talk of panic attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-22
Updated: 2020-11-22
Packaged: 2021-03-10 00:22:04
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,118
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27674645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QuietlyImplode/pseuds/QuietlyImplode
Summary: Natasha and Steve have a chat - she's been avoiding him and he wants to know why._____“I.. Scare you?” He sits back down giving her space.She looks up. Gives him a small smile.“Not quite. You.. Induce a response..” stops and thinks of how to explain.
Relationships: Clint Barton & Steve Rogers, Clint Barton/Natasha Romanov, Steve Rogers & Natasha Romanov
Series: Rescue Me [19]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1984783
Comments: 2
Kudos: 40





	Contraindications

**Author's Note:**

> Almost there I swear. 3 more stand alones and then a chapter of 8.   
> And then i will stop clogging tags - haha maybe.

Punching the punching bag hard, Clint works his frustration. It’s been a really shit month. He’s tired and grumpy and feels like he’s been playing babysitter.

Steve finds him.. Not in a good mood.

“Hey,” he opens.

“Hey.” Clint replies, taking his headphones out.

“What’s up?”

“Have you seen Natasha?”

Panic starts to whir in his stomach.

“No, why? Is she ok? I think she was resting?”

Steve looks sheepish.

“I just haven’t spoken to her in ages. And since, you know,” Clint does indeed know, “well, you guys got back, she’s speaking to Pepper and Tony and you, but I think she’s avoiding me?”

Clint shrugs. “I don’t know. You’re gonna have to ask her.”

Steve looks over his shoulder.

“Well I would, but I can’t find her. It’s like she knows I’m coming and disappears. I was wondering if you’d let her know I’m looking for her, and ask her to come chat to me on her terms?” Steve is not as dumb as he can some times come across. Naïve, maybe, but there’s a brain in there.

“Um. Sure. No promises though.” Steve nods, leaves him to pound the bag. He puts his headphones in. Looks up at the ceiling.

“You hear that, Nat? Steve’s looking for you. Don’t be an ass.”

He’s not actually sure if she’s up there but she’s taken to copying his movements of moving around the tower in unconventional ways.

He turns his music up and drowns out any thoughts he has, focusing on hitting harder.

.

Showered and changed, Clint feels better. Lighter. He heads to Natasha’s room, knocks on the door. Enters and finds her reading on the couch. No more locked doors.

“Hey,” he says.

“Hey.”

“Steve’s looking for you.”

She looks up. “What did you tell him?” Eyes narrowing. Clint looks surprised.

“He’s right. You’re avoiding him? Why?”

Natasha turns back to her book.

“He said some things.”

Clint’s confused. She hasn’t so much as had a conversation with Steve since the mission, maybe once at ‘that’ dinner. And he’s pretty sure they were on speaking terms before that.

“When!?” He says incredulously.

“Just drop it, Clint. I’ll work it out with him.”

He plonks himself down next to her.

“Move.” He says.

She’s reading his books again.

“Like what you’re reading?”

“Yeah,” she says, turning the book over to show him. The Power of One.

Good book, he thinks.

“Where you up to?”

“Peekay’s in the mines, I’m almost done.”

“Hey Nat?” He grabs the books off her. “Go talk to Steve.”

She looks at him, pissed.

“Hey Clint?” She grabs the book back. “Get fucked.” Wrong play he thinks. Gets up and leaves her to her book.

Sends Steve a message, ‘She’s in her room.’

Gets a message back. ‘Thanks’

He grimaces, she’s gonna be hella pissed.

.

She hears a knock at the door. She opens it, thinking it’s Clint coming back to apologise. It’s not. It’s Steve. Immediately her skins crawling and breathing is just a bit harder. It’s manageable and she backs up just a little.

Let’s him in, and heads straight for the kitchen.

“Want a drink?” She calls to her visitor. She needs something cold, ice in water. Grounding. See, she says to herself, I’ve learnt something.

Steve answers negatively and she gestures for him to take a seat. She sits across.

“How are you?” He opens.

“Fine.” Natasha replies, taking a sip for water.

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he follows up.

“Yeah.” She says, truthfully.

“Why?”

He looks sad.

She did that. Guilt overtakes her and she feels the need to explain, do something to stop that look. She takes him in. Stoic and intelligent eyes regard her.

“You said some things.” It sounds dumb. It is dumb. She’s rubbing her index finger over her thumb. Takes another sip.

Steve looks confused. “When? I —“

She holds he hand up to stop his questions.

“You said some things when— when I wasn’t thinking straight,” pauses. “When I wasn’t myself.”

Steve looks at her, not understanding.

She sighs. She didn’t want to do this today. Didn’t really want to do it at all.

But, she supposes, like Pepper, she values Steve’s friendship. Needs to make an effort and help him understand.

“I saw things, not real things, but you were there. You told me I know nothing of being strong, that I don’t deserve comfort and I’m not to be trusted.”

Steve looks horrified.

“Nat, I didn’t, I—“ he gets off before she hold up her hand to stop him.

“I know. I know.” She says placating him.

“The side effects of having it happen means that you have this unfortunate effect of inducing panic.” She stops. Takes another sip.

“I.. Scare you?” He sits back down giving her space.

She looks up. Gives him a small smile.

“Not quite. You.. Induce a response..” stops and thinks of how to explain.

“Do you remember when you just came out of the ice; and when you’d go into cold areas it would give you this feel of unease? Like you just wanted to be warm and away from that area?”

He nods. Looks forlorn. Knows where this is heading.

“That’s how you feel about me?”

She nods. “I don’t know why it’s so bad with you. My brain is an idiot.”

“What can I do?” Interesting. She’s so glad he hasn’t tried to hug her.

She takes a drink of water. Sets it down and leans forward.

“I don’t know, right now. I’m working on it, I swear.”

“But it shouldn’t be all on you.”

She hesitates. Reaches out and holds onto his arm.

Feels.. Ok. She lets it go. Hopes that it was somewhat reassuring.

“Maybe, if you want, you can train with me sometime?”

He barks a laugh. “You can’t be around me but can spar together? Nat, you’re one of the strongest people I know, and I trust you with my life. You have to know that. You have to know that I would never say that, never think that..”

She lets him go on.

“I just don’t want to hurt you.”

She finishes the water. Stands. He copies her movement.

“Tomorrow.” She says, determination calming her. “Meet me in the gym at 11. Old patterns and routines might help.”

Steve looks suspicious. “You sure?”

Natasha nods.

“Yeah, it’ll be fun.”

Steve looks goofy. Doesn’t go for a hug, instead points his index finger at her. “Touch it.” He says.

She looks at him. “What?”

“Like our version of hugging - for now. Touch it.”

A laugh breaks free. Their index fingers touch.

“See you tomorrow, Nat.”

She smiles, opens the door. See Clint coming down the hall.

“See you tomorrow.”


End file.
